Competition Freaks Essay

According to Dr. Phil, Everybody likes to be a captivatener, entirely some people are rival freaks who have to be send-off, be the best or win at everything they do. This overly competitive nature often condemnations causes tension in their personal relationships. Love and competition are oil and water, they do non mix, Dr. Phil warns. He offers the following advice for competitive people who want to cut across their need to compete, and learn to relax and enjoy what they have.Being competitive in our academic, working and personal lives hind end be good for achieving success and moving into the ranks of glory and glamour. Competitive attitudes faeces help you to feel energized, able to take on challenging tasks and ready to achieve many things in life. However, competitive behavior that is not considerate of your well-being or well balanced in its application can take its toll, leash to self destruction and perhaps ostracizing the very people you care about the most.REFER ENCE http//www.drphil.com/articles/article/510http//www.wikihow.com/Be-Competitive-in-a-Non-Destructive-Way1. SELFISHNESSB. effect OF COMPETING1. NEGATIVE EFFECT1.1 SELF- HATREDAnother risk of burying our competitive feelings is that we may beat them round and use them to feel bad about ourselves. A straightforward competitive prospect like, I hatred that he is so smart and always says the right thing, may turn into an attack toward our selves like, You are so stupid. You never know what to say. He is so much more than engaging than you.When we turn against our competitive feelings, we turn against ourselves. We feel ashamed of who we are and what we want. quite of seeking to emulate the people we admire, we simply tear ourselves pot in relation to them. With so many disconfirming manifestations of suppressing our direct competitive feelings, how can we face them more honestly and snitch sure to use them in healthy ways?First of all, we have to echo that feeling competit ive is not about letting these emotions take over or ruminating in negative thoughts. Its about subscribe toing our naturally occurring competitive responses, feeling them fully and moving on. We can accept that we have these feelings a lot of the time. We can even have fun with them, letting ourselves have the nastiest thought possible, then letting that thought go. Doing this as an exercise can feel clean, healthy and even refreshing.As illustrated by the above examples, when we suppress our competitive feelings, they have a way of seeping into and influencing our behavior. Yet, each time we acknowledge that we have these thoughts, we can consciously choose how we want to act. We can be much more proactive in becoming the best version of ourselves, both accepting ourselves and evolving, as the motivated (and competitive) individuals that we inherently are.1.2 JEALOUSY/BEING ENVYCompetitive feelings can be full of jealousy. Allowing ourselves to have competitive thoughts allow no t leave us falling victim to unstoppable fits of envy or suspicion. When we hold foul our healthy and natural competitive feelings, we strengthen the negative parts of those feelings jealousy included. Instead of building a case against someone, we can face the reality of our feelings and adopt a healthier attitude. For example, a guy I know recently revealed to me a thought process he went through at a caller with his girlfriend. He noticed that she was happily chatting with other people, including a few men throughout the night. At first he thought, She is totally flirting with my friend.Why does she light up around him? Is she more into him than me? I should still dump her before she makes a fool out of me. At a certain point, he realise that what he was genuinely feeling was competitive. He wanted her to respond to him the way she was responding to other people at the party. His thinking quickly changed to, I love when she is fun like this. I want to share that with her. In stead of listening tothe voice in his head that told him to pull away and act cold to her, he linked her and take ind in joking around with her. By being lighthearted and fun himself, she was naturally move to him, and they were both able to feel closer and happier with each other. If hed acted on his jealous insecurities, instead than admitting he felt competitive, he would have achieved just the opposite.1.3 SELF-DENIALOne of the worst results of denying our competitive feelings is that it can cause us to reject what we really want in life. Because feelings of desire or jealousy make us uncomfortable, we may pretend that we dont want whatever we once longed for anymore. If someone we had a crush on goes out with someone else or if a job we interviewed for falls through, we can slowly turn against ourselves and become self-denying. Instead of thinking, I really wanted that, and Im furious that I didnt get it, we might think, I dont even care. I never really wanted that. Im not going to put myself out there to embarrass myself again. When we engage in this pattern, we become increasingly passive. Rather than going after what we desire, we avoid it, all in the rice beer of denying our unacceptable competitive feelings.REFERENCE http//www.psychologytoday.com/ communicate/compassion-matters/201309/the-benefits-feeling-competitive2. POSSITIVE EFFECT2.1 MAKES YOU PERSEVEREWhen you look at someone up of you and you do whatever it takes to catch up to themthat is the essence of pains. You dont give up until you are at the top. Without competition, we would have no reason to persevere. We wouldnt know our limits and how far we can stretch them. The rewards of perseverance are priceless and to experience such rewards, you need a reason, and competition is that reason.2.2 HELPS ASSESS YOUR STRENGHTS AND WEAKNESSESFollowing up from my previous point, what you do notice is what you are doing right and what you are doing wrong. With competition, you have a way to sum how well or how poorly you are doing. Knowing what you are good at and what you are not is extremely important, because success is all about accentuating your strengths and hiding your weaknesses. How well you accomplish this determines how far you go.REFERENCE http//www.ineedmotivation.com/blog/2008/05/7-positives-of-competition/